Guardianwork

Friday 2nd November 2007

I returned to work today to around 60 odd e-mails. That will teach me for being sick. I set about getting through the madness of what had gone on in my absence when:


To: Ian Carpenter
Subject: A bad day for france


Nobby 2 v 6 Eddie

1st leg southend to brentford

Eddie raced into an almost immediate lead on joining M25 but could not hold on as I entered Hertfordshire. 1 - 1. South Mimms appears to be temporarily French?? 2 - 1.
Imagine my delight when Eddie rammed home a hattrick in the space of a minute! 2 - 4. I must admit to a small shout of 'yes'. Is that wrong? Despite 3 James Irlam pitch invasions Eddie kept the pressure on an the fifth was slotted in just after the M1. 2 - 5.
A cheeky sixth at Rickmansworth finished off the Frenchies. 2 - 6. Bring on the 2nd leg. Report to follow.

To: Ian Carpenter
Subject: Putting England back on the map


Nobby 4 v 7 Eddie
6 - 13 On aggregate
2nd leg brentford to southend

After a wasted journey to Brentford I was looking forward to the 2nd leg with a very comfortable margin. Started well. Two early Eddie's just after M4 and just before M1. 0 - 2.
Needing a pee I turned off a South Mimms. On the slip road I pulled up behind a Nobby. The ref would not listen to my cries of offside. 1 - 2. Possibly enjoying this too much?? A turn for the worse when Nobby brought out the big guns - 2 tankers at the Holmesdale tunnel. 3 - 2.
I suspect the dirty burger van man was making a killing in Waltham Abbey - another hattrick for Eddie!3 - 5.
A straggler just after that made it 3 - 6.
The A12 gave Nobby a consolation. 4 - 6.
I though that would be that until just as I was turning off at the A127 Eddie started to run round the Frenchies with his willy hanging out. 4 - 7.

What a fantastic game of Norbert Dentressangle V Eddie Stobart! 6-13 on aggregate!

This was from my boss, Steve. I can see this game catching on. Not only that, but it put my game on the way to Feltham into absolute shame. Good work.

Anyway, tonight I got in and there was no food in the house. Not surprising, as I had been cooped up in bed for a couple of days, and Nicky has been working very hard. So I decided to test out the Doctor's potion by having an Indian meal delivered. Kill or cure, I reckon. For the record, chicken rogan josh, pilau rice, naan, vegetable passanda, and some onion bahjees.

The chain smoking spider has been on a little adventure this evening. She normally never ventures outside the picture rail, but tonight she was a good window away from home. Perhaps she was inspired by our epic journey to Switzerland last weekend. The picture shows the recently discovered arachnid enjoying the pleasure of smoking.

I have never seen a health warning on the side of a cigarette packet that says smoking is harmful to those spiders around you, so I think I am on safe ground when it comes to the RSPCA and such like. (She is to the right of the pair of gloves for all chain smoking spider aficionados).

What I did notice was a couple more orbs...

No responses from e-mail today from any jobs, and I have not heard from tenuk.